Sunday, April 13, 2008

Oops. Did I Say That?

Love the little guy. I swear I do. But sometimes it would just be nice to go back to not being needed so much. My baby needs me to survive. That's what I love and hate about breastfeeding. It is so wonderful for both of us. It is totally worth it. But it sometimes really gets on my nerves. I mean, can't I just get some stuff done and come and go as I please and not have to drop what I am doing or stay at home a few more minutes or not go somewhere alltogether? Not when I am breastfeeding. I am on Kingston's clock and have to be available for him whenever and wherever he needs me. I must admit that I won't be totally sad to see it go in a few months. If I can just make it to 6 months. . .

Today was one of those days. I just wished I didn't have to be at his beck and call. I am not his beck and call girl. (Pretty Woman reference-did you get that?) I feel guilty that I resented him today. But I think that if you ask any mom, she will know the feeling. At least I hope that is true!

I often say, "Come on, Kingston. Give a mom a break!" Today I meant it. Breastfeeding was on my last. There. I said it. Please don't turn me in to the La Leche League. I still gave him the boob all day long, just as he requested. I just didn't always do it with a smile on my face-not that he cared!


Eden said...

Girl...I only lasted to 6 weeks. I totally hear ya!!

Missy said...

Not that I have any clue as to what you are going through, but I can only imagine. I'm sure it's one of those things that you'd love to have Nigel handle for a couple of feedings.